Another mini-rant: "Erase Words"

[kaasirpent]

An excerpt from a Usenet post in response to something I posted:

I happen to be in a mood that makes me want to point out your folly, though. Nothing personal.

Obviously this guy knows that what he is about to say WILL likely be taken personally, yet he tries to cover his ass with the Universal Erase Words "Nothing personal."

Nothing personal, but you're a moron.
Don't take this the wrong way, but you're a moron.
I mean this with all due respect: you're a moron.
You're a moron--but I don't mean that in a bad way.
You're a moron, but I mean that in the best possible sense.

There are dozens of ways to say it, but what it comes down to is, "I'm going to insult you, and I know I'm going to insult you, but I think you're such a moron that I'm going to try to convince you (and perhaps myself) that I don't mean it as an insult if I use this little Universal Erase Phrase."

You're probably going to take this the wrong way, but...
I don't want you to get angry, but...
I'm not trying to start a fight, but...

Let's all do each other a favor. Let's do our best to eliminate this particular stupidity from the English language. If you have something to say, then say it. Don't use waffle words to try to convince people (or yourself) that you don't mean something you're saying. If you say it, MEAN it.

And if you really are trying to say something unpleasant, either find a kinder way to say it (if you actually care how the other person takes it) or just be blunt and say it. You do our language a disservice by trying to find a way to weasel out of meaning what you say.

And if you say something and you mean it and someone comes along and shows you to be incorrect in some way, have the grace and dignity to stand by your original statement and accept defeat without trying to say something like "you just took my words out of context."

Take a minute to actually think about the wording instead of just vomiting words onto the page.

Comments

Nothing Personal.

[etherial.livejournal.com]

In this case, I thought the old NP was used in reference to the fact that this *particular* moron hadn't done anything *particularly* noteworthy, just that the poster needed someone to destroy, and this guy was handy.

[poopsmoothie.livejournal.com]

In Anne of Green Gables, as I recall, Anne notes that when people start by saying "I feel it is only my duty to inform you--", it's never something GOOD. :) They never say "I feel it is only my duty to inform you that you are a wonderful human being", for example.