Random Thought: Homeopathic Kegger

[kaasirpent]

Hey, everyone! Your friendly neighborhood Skippy, here!

Here's a tip for homeopaths who want to have a keg party, but don't have the fundage for a keg:

1. Fill a bathtub with water. To the brim.


2. Add a single drop of the beer of your choice.


3. Agitate the water to mix the drop of beer with the water thoroughly.


4. Drink up! It may not taste like beer, but it'll have the same effects!


5. When the tub only has a few drops left at the bottom, fill it back up with more water.


6. By the principles of homeopathy, each subsequent tub full will be more powerful than the last!


7. By the 8th or 9th tub full, you should be able to get passing-out drunk with only a single sip! But make sure you agitate after each refill!

Caution: Make sure not to accidentally mix anything else into the water. *wink* *wink* By the principles of homeopathy, anything you mix in the water gets more powerful with each dilution!

Try the same technique with champagne (for wedding receptions)! Bourbon! Chocolate milk (for kids' parties)! Cyanide-laced Kool-Aid (for creepy religious cult gatherings)! The possibilities are as endless as the gullibility of anyone who uses homeopathic remedies!

Disclaimer: Neither Skippy nor kaasirpent can be held liable for driving breweries out of business. Or for any resulting water toxicity for anyone gullible enough to take this post seriously.

Comments

[fauxklore]

I got a good laugh from this.

[kaasirpent]

Yay! That was the intent. :)

[dorsai.livejournal.com]

Drink up! It may not taste like beer, but it'll have the same effects!

Indeed. And since both drinking beer and drinking a bathtub full of beer-infused water will produce the piss-like-a-racehorse (now, what's the origin of that expression, I wonder?) effect, they are demonstrably the same.

[kaasirpent]

I thought of that, and tried to work it in, but...I went with funny over biologically correct. :)

And on the etymology front, Google came through for me in one:

I can clarify the racehorse thing. The phrase “need to piss like a racehorse” should be parsed [need to] [piss like a racehorse], *not* [need to piss] [like a racehorse]. In other words, racehorses have no special need to piss that other organisms do not. Rather, racehorses piss in a particular way, and the speaker needs to piss in that way. And what is that way, you ask? In a long gushing torrent, as you’ll know if you ever observe a racehorse pissing.

The original page is here.

[marmota.livejournal.com]

*nod* I pronounce it "homeopathetic".

[kaasirpent]

I tried several ways to work that very word into my post, but it wouldn't fit. Thank you. :)

[liddle-oldman.livejournal.com]

I'm going to apply this to bourbon! It'll be great.

[yttrai.livejournal.com]

You slay me. I wish LJ had a posrep system. You would be flooded right now if it did!

[kaasirpent]

. o O ( "posrep"? )

[yttrai.livejournal.com]

Positive (or negative) reputation. Some vbulletin based messageboards use the system to help build a sense of community. Or encourage mayhem ;)

[bramblekite.livejournal.com]

so..are you saying I could have a new & better batch of beer if I just filled up my newly-empty beer bottle with water and swished it around? I've just been doing that to rinse the bottles for recycling! But I could DRINK the product instead!

ROCK ON!

[kaasirpent]

Totally! I hadn't thought it that far through, but...it makes sense!

Well, as much sense as the rest of homeopathy, anyway. :)

[lepusdomesticus.livejournal.com]

This was very funny. Although, I do wonder what sort of "homeopathic" product labels you are reading... : )

[kaasirpent]

I don't read homeopathic product labels. I just know what homeopathy is, and this is...not that far off, actually. Except that a "real" homeopathic solution made with beer like this would actually claim to cure hangovers, not cause them. :)